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CHAPTER NINE

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    rquitesay,thoughitwasnotforlackoftrying.Andshecouldnotaskyoubacktoherroom,foritwas"notveryclean,I'mafraid,"soshemustcatchyouinthepassage,ortakeachairinHydeParktoexplainherphilosophy.Therhythmofthesouldependsonit—("howrudethelittleboysare!"shewouldsay),andMr.Asquith'sIrishpolicy,andShakespearecomesin,"andQueenAlexandramostgraciouslyonceacknowledgedacopyofmypamphlet,"shewouldsay,wavingthelittleboysmagnificentlyaway.Butsheneedsfundstopublishherbook,for"publishersarecapitalists—publishersarecowards."Andso,diggingherelbowintoherpileofbooksitfellover. Jacobremainedquiteunmoved. ButFraser,theatheist,ontheotherside,detestingplush,morethanonceaccostedwithleaflets,shiftedirritably.Heabhorredvagueness—theChristianreligion,forexample,andoldDeanParker'spronouncements.DeanParkerwrotebooksandFraserutterlydestroyedthembyforceoflogicandlefthischildrenunbaptized—hiswifediditsecretlyinthewashingbasin—butFraserignoredher,andwentonsupportingblasphemers,distributingleaflets,gettinguphisfactsintheBritishMuseum,alwaysinthesamechecksuitandfierytie,butpale,spotted,irritable.Indeed,whatawork—todestroyreligion! JacobtranscribedawholepassagefromMarlowe. MissJuliaHedge,thefeminist,waitedforherbooks.Theydidnotcome.Shewettedherpen.Shelookedabouther.HereyewascaughtbythefinallettersinLordMacaulay'sname.Andshereadthemallroundthedome—thenamesofgreatmenwhichremindus—"Ohdamn,"saidJuliaHedge,"whydidn'ttheyleaveroomforanEliotoraBronte?" UnfortunateJulia!wettingherpeninbitterness,andleavinghershoelacesuntied.Whenherbookscamesheappliedherselftohergiganticlabours,butperceivedthroughoneofthenervesofherexasperatedsensibilityhowcomposedly,unconcernedly,andwitheveryconsiderationthemalereadersappliedthemselvestotheirs.Thatyoungmanforexample.Whathadhegottodoexceptcopyoutpoetry?Andshemuststudystatistics.Therearemorewomenthanmen.Yesbutifyouletwomenworkasmenwork,they'lldieoffmuchquicker.They'llbecomeextinct.Thatwasherargument.Deathandgallandbitterdustwereonherpen-tipandastheafternoonworeon,redhadworkedintohercheek-bonesandalightwasinhereyes. ButwhatbroughtJacobFlanderstoreadMarloweintheBritishMuseum?Youth,youth—somethingsavage—somethingpedantic.Forexample,thereisMr.Masefield,thereisMr.Bennett.StuffthemintotheflameofMarloweandburnthemtocinders.Letnotashredremain.Don'tpalterwiththesecondrate.Detestyour
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