lyselfish.Butmostunbearableofallwasherownextremehumiliation.
Therainpoureddown,unceasing,andthedespairofnatureateintohersoul.Atlastshewasexhaustedandlosingthoughtoftime,layhalf-unconscious,feelingatleastnopain,herbrainvacantandweary.WhenaservantcametoaskifMissGlovermightseeher,shehardlyunderstood.
“MissGloverdoesn’tusuallystandonsuchceremony,”shesaidill-temperedly,forgettingtheincidentofthepreviousweek.“Askhertocomein.”
Theparson’ssistercametothedoorandhesitated,growingredtheexpressioninhereyeswaspained,andevenfrightened.
“MayIcomein,Bertha?”
“Yes.”
Shewalkedstraighttothesofa,andfellonherknees.
“Oh,Bertha,pleaseforgiveme.Iwaswrong,andI’vebehavedwickedlytoyou.”
“MydearFanny,”murmuredBertha,asmilebreakingthroughhermisery.
“IwithdraweverywordIsaidtoyou,BerthaIcan’tunderstandhowIsaidit.Ihumblybegyourforgiveness.”
“Thereisnothingtoforgive.”
“Oh,yes,thereis.Goodheavens,Iknow!MyconsciencehasbeenreproachingmeeversinceIwashere,butIhardenedmyheart,andwouldnotlisten.”
PoorMissGlovercouldnotreallyhavehardenedherheart,howevermuchshetried.
“IknewIoughttocometoyouandbegyourforgiveness,butIwouldn’t.I’venotsleptawinkatnight.Iwasafraidofdying,andifI’dbeencutoffinthemidstofmywickedness,Ishouldhavebeenlost.”
Shespokeveryquickly,findingitevidentlyarelieftoexpresshertrouble.
“IthoughtCharleswouldupbraidme,buthe’sneversaidaword.Oh,Iwishhehad,itwouldhavebeeneasiertobearthanhissorrowfullook.Iknowhe’sbeenworryingdreadfully,andI’msosorryforhim.IkeptonsayingI’donlydonemyduty,butinmyheartIknewIhaddonewrong.OhBertha,andthismorningIdarednottakecommunion,IthoughtGodwouldstrikemeforblasphemy.AndIwasafraidCharleswouldrefusemeinfrontofthewholecongregation....It’sthefirstSundaysinceIwasconfirmed,thatI’vemissedtakingHolyCommunion.”
Sheburiedherfaceinherhands,crying.Berthaheardher,almostlistlesslyforherowntroublewasoverwhelmingandshecouldnott