eremorse,andhehadtornhimselfawayfromthetemptressandfled.
Ihardlyknewwhathadhappenedwhenshewasleftalone,piningforherlover.Scandalsaidevilthings....Hadshe,too,feltremorseandtriedtokillherlove,andhadtheattemptfailed?Andwasitthensheflungherselfintodissipationtodrownhertrouble?Perhapshetoldherhedidnotloveher,andsheindespairmayhavethrownherselfinthearmsofotherlovers.Buthelovedhertoostronglytoforgetheratlasthecouldnotbeartheabsenceandcameback.Andagainwithenjoymentcameremorse,and,ashamed,hefled,hatinghimself,despisingher.
Theyearspassedby,andherhusbanddied.Whydidhenotcomebacktoher?Hadhelosthisloveandwasheafraid?Icouldnotunderstand....
Thenshemetme.Ah,Iwonderedwhatshefelt.Didsheloveme?Perhapshislongabsencehadmadeherpartlyforgethim,andshethoughthehadforgottenher.Shefellinlovewithme,andI—Ilovedherwithallmyheart.Iknewshelovedmethenshemusthavelovedme!Buthecameback.Hemayhavethoughthimselfcured,hemayhavesaidthathecouldmeethercoldlyandindifferently.HadInotsaidthesame?Butastheysawoneanothertheoldloveburstout,againitburntthemwithconsumingfire,andGiuliahatedmebecauseIhadmadeherfaithlesstotheloverofherheart.
Thecandleswereburninglow,throwingstrangelightsandshadowsonthefacesofthedead.
Poorfool!Hislovewasaspowerfulasever,buthefoughtagainstitwithallthestrengthofhisweakwill.ShewastheEvilOnetohimshetookhisyouthfromhim,hismanhood,hishonour,hisstrengthhefeltthatherkissesdegradedhim,andasherosefromherembracehefeltvileandmean.Hevowednevertotouchheragain,andeverytimehebrokethevow.Butherlovewasthesameasever—passionate,evenheartless.Shecarednotifsheconsumedhimaslongasshelovedhim.Forherhemightruinhislife,hemightlosehissoul.Shecaredfornothingitwasallandallforlove.
Hefledagain,andsheturnedhereyesonmeoncemore.Perhapsshefeltsorryformypain,perhapsshefanciedmylovewouldeffacetheremembranceofhim.Andweweremarried.Ah!nowthatshewasdeadIcouldallowhergoodintentions.Shemayhaveintendedtobefaithfultomeshemayhavethoughtshecouldtrulyloveandhonourme.Perhapsshetriedwhoknow