ts’endwhattodowiththemoney.Ifmyhairwouldonlychangecolour,here’sanicelittlecriballreadyformetostepinto.’
“‘Why,whatisit,then?’Iasked.Yousee,Mr.Holmes,Iamaverystay-at-homeman,andasmybusinesscametomeinsteadofmyhavingtogotoit,Iwasoftenweeksonendwithoutputtingmyfootoverthedoor-mat.InthatwayIdidn’tknowmuchofwhatwasgoingonoutside,andIwasalwaysgladofabitofnews.
“‘HaveyouneverheardoftheLeagueoftheRed-headedMen?’heaskedwithhiseyesopen.
“‘Never.’
“‘Why,Iwonderatthat,foryouareeligibleyourselfforoneofthevacancies.’
“‘Andwhataretheyworth?’Iasked.
“‘Oh,merelyacoupleofhundredayear,buttheworkisslight,anditneednotinterfereverymuchwithone’sotheroccupations.’
“Well,youcaneasilythinkthatthatmademeprickupmyears,forthebusinesshasnotbeenovergoodforsomeyears,andanextracoupleofhundredwouldhavebeenveryhandy.
“‘Tellmeallaboutit,’saidI.
“‘Well,’saidhe,showingmetheadvertisement,‘youcanseeforyourselfthattheLeaguehasavacancy,andthereistheaddresswhereyoushouldapplyforparticulars.AsfarasIcanmakeout,theLeaguewasfoundedbyanAmericanmillionaire,EzekiahHopkins,whowasverypeculiarinhisways.Hewashimselfred-headed,andhehadagreatsympathyforallred-headedmenso,whenhedied,itwasfoundthathehadlefthisenormousfortuneinthehandsoftrustees,withinstructionstoapplytheinteresttotheprovidingofeasyberthstomenwhosehairisofthatcolour.FromallIhearitissplendidpayandverylittletodo.’
“‘But,’saidI,‘therewouldbemillionsofred-headedmenwhowouldapply.’
“‘Notsomanyasyoumightthink,’heanswered.‘YouseeitisreallyconfinedtoLondoners,andtogrownmen.ThisAmericanhadstartedfromLondonwhenhewasyoung,andhewantedtodotheoldtownagoodturn.Then,again,Ihavehearditisnouseyourapplyingifyourhairislightred,ordarkred,oranythingbutrealbright,blazing,fieryred.Now,ifyoucaredtoapply,Mr.Wilson,youwouldjustwalkinbutperhapsitwouldhardlybeworthyourwhiletoputyourselfoutofthewayforthesakeofafewhundredpounds.’
“Now,itisafact,gentlemen,asyoumayseeforyourselves,thatmyhairisofaveryfullandrichtint,sothatitseemedtomethatiftherewastobeanycompetitioninthematterIstoodasgoodachanceasanymanthatIhadevermet.VincentSpauldingseemedtoknowsomuchaboutitthatIthoughthemightproveuseful,soIjustorderedhimtoputuptheshuttersforthedayandtocomerightawaywithme.Hewasverywillingtohaveaholiday,soweshutthebusinessupandstartedofffortheaddressthatwasgivenusintheadvertisement.
“Ineverhopetoseesuchasightasthatagain,Mr.Holmes.Fromnorth,south,east,andwesteverymanwhohadashadeofredinhishairhadtrampedintothecitytoanswertheadvertisement.FleetStreetwaschokedwithred-headedfolk,andPope’sCourtlookedlikeacoster’sorangebarrow.Ishouldnothavethoughtthereweresomanyinthewholecountryaswerebroughttogetherbythatsingleadvertisement.Everyshadeofcolourtheywere—straw,lemon,orange,brick,Irish-setter,liver,claybut,asSpauldingsaid,therewerenotmanywhohadtherealvividflame-colouredtint.WhenIsawhowmanywerewaiting,IwouldhavegivenitupindespairbutSpauldingwouldnothearofit.HowhediditIcouldnotimagine,buthepushedandpulledandbutteduntilhegotmethroughthecrowd,andrightuptothestepswhichledtotheoffice.Therewasadoublestreamuponthestair,somegoingupinhope,andsomecomingbackdejectedbutwewedgedinaswellaswecouldandsoonfoundourselvesintheoffice.”
“Yourexperiencehasbeenamostentertainingone,”remarkedHolmesashisclientpausedandrefreshedhismemorywithahugepinchofsnuff.“Praycontinueyourveryinterestingstatement.”
“Therewasnothingintheofficebutacoupleofwoodenchairsandadealtable,behindwhichsatasmallmanwithaheadthatwasevenredderthanmine.Hesaidafewwordstoeachcandidateashecameup,andthenhealwaysmanagedtofindsomefaultinthemwhichwoulddisqualifythem.Gettingavacancydidnotseemtobesuchaveryeasymatter,afterall.However,whenourturncamethelittlemanwasmuchmorefavourabletomethantoanyoftheothers,andheclosedthedoorasweentered,sothathemighthaveaprivatewordwithus.
“‘ThisisMr.JabezWilson,’saidmyassistant,‘andheiswillingtofillavacancyintheLeague.’
“‘Andheisadmirablysuitedforit,’theotheranswered.‘Hehaseveryrequirement.IcannotrecallwhenIhaveseenanythingsofine.’Hetookastepbackward,cockedhisheadononeside,andgazedatmyhairuntilIfeltquitebashful.Thensuddenlyheplungedforward,wrun