omewhenanyworkwastobedone.Buthewasyoung,withtheworldbeforehimthereweremanycareersfreetothemanwhohadnofearofdeath.Africaopenedherduskyarmstotheadventurer,ruthlessanddesperatetheworldwassolargeandmanifold,therewasamplescopeforallhislonging.Ifthereweredifficulties,hecouldovercomethemperilswouldaddsalttotheattempt,freedomwouldbelikestrongwine.Ah,thatwaswhathedesired,freedom—freedomtofeelthathewashisownmasterthathewasnotenchainedbytheloveandhateofothers,bythetiesofconventionandofhabit.Everybondwastedious.Hehadnothingtolose,andeverythingtowin.Butjustthosetieswhicheverymanmaydivideofhisownfreewillarethemostoppressivetheyareunfelt,unseen,tillsuddenlytheyburnthewristslikefettersoffire,andthepoorwretchwhowearsthemhasnopowertohelphimself.
Jamesknewhehadnotstrengthforthisfearlessdisregardofothershedarednotfacethepainhewouldcause.Hewasactinglikeafoolhiskindnesswasonlycowardly.Buttobecruelrequiredmorecouragethanhepossessed.Ifhewentaway,hisanguishwouldneverceasehisvividimaginationwouldkeepbeforehismind'seyethehumiliationofMary,theunhappinessofhispeople.Hepicturedtheconsternationandthehorrorwhentheydiscoveredwhathehaddone.Atfirsttheywouldrefusetobelievethathewascapableofactinginsoblackguardlyawaytheywouldthinkitajoke,orthathewasmad.Andthentheshamewhentheyrealisedthetruth!Howcouldhemakesuchareturnforalltheaffectionandthegentlenessbehadreceived?Hisfather,whomheloveddevotedly,wouldbeutterlycrushed.
"Itwouldkillhim,"mutteredJames.
Andthenhethoughtofhispoormother,affectionateandkind,butcapableofhatinghimifheactedcontrarytohercodeofhonour.Herimmaculatevirtuemadeherveryhardsheexactedthehighestfromherself,anddemandednolessfromothers.Jamesrememberedinhisboyhoodhowshepunishedhispettycrimesbyrefusingtospeaktohim,goingaboutincoldandangrysilencehehadneverforgottentheicyindignationofherfacewhenonceshehadcaughthimlying.Oh,thesegoodpeople,howpitilessth